Last Friday, my group and I had handed in the 30-paged result of our group work about the treatment of stray dogs in 18th and 19th century Copenhagen. This sounds like the most useless subject ever (we didn’t choose it), and I admit the literature on this was quite sparse, but it was actually a big problem in Europe at the time (dating all the way back to the 16th century), so there was a point somewhere in there somewhere. I think. We’ll see what the professionals say when we have to “defend” it on June 24th. I feel kind of 85% about it, you know? All three of us did everything we could, but I’m not sure it measures up to what is expected at this point, but only time will tell. I will try to take it as a learning experience. Group work is (damn) hard, and I took that as a learning experience, too.
This Friday, the 6th of the 6th, is my birthday. 25: a quarter of a century. My grandfather and I picked up my birthday gift last week — a pair of light blue bouncy sneakers that will undoubtedly take me far this summer. We also watched that movie about Donald Rumsfeld. Seriously, would you buy a used car from that man? I don’t think so. With this movie he set the stage for his own self-promotion, and while I admire his zealous approach to note-taking, I think it is important to take what is said with a grain of salt. It is Mr. Weapons-Of-Mass-Destruction after all. But it made me smarter, and anything that makes me smarter is greatly valued by me. That is also what I told my Global History-Professor during our evaluation, that every Friday afternoon at 5 I have left the classroom feeling just so much smarter. And he in return told me that that is exactly how he wanted to make us feel.
But back to my 25th birthday. I feel sort of sad about this birthday. It’s a milestone of some sort, and it feels as if I am turning an important corner of my life. I’m beginning to feel a sense of pressure, and a need to plan where I am going in regards to everything. What am I working towards? How can I plan things just right to where I can accomplish it all and in due time? Is it the media that is making me feel old? Is it because I, despite my now present feminist enlightenment, have been spoonfed that a woman only has so many years to “fool around” and do what she wants to do before she ought to start thinking in practicalities?
If that is how I subconsciously think, then I don’t even deserve a birthday. But we can’t get around it — it’s there. It’s a fact.
I’m working on achieving my BA degree as we speak, and four years from now I will hopefully have that, and my master’s degree in the bag. I’ll be 29 then. Every day I dream of munching on fat baby arms and legs; I even talked to my grandmother about it this weekend. I can’t remember the exact wording of the question, but she asked me something along the lines of, “Aren’t you just so much looking forward to having children?”, to which I said, “YES! So much. I can’t wait.” It’s a topic I could talk about forever, really, but then I remember that it is absolutely not the right time right now, and I am a firm believer in timing things—probably because my siblings and I all came as surprises, and as our family grew, our financial means did not, if you know what I mean. And that was hard.
A is very sensible, very responsible. I love him for that – so much. It is very important for me that we are on the same page on this, and until we are, there will be no babies. Just lots of lovin’.
But back to my birthday (this is getting a little repetitive). I got an email from some Danish jewelry website that they are closing, and that all their items are at least 60% off, so I bought myself some birthday presents. All of this for less than 80 bucks, and the pearls are real! I have always wanted a pearl necklace, but they are always so expensive, so this felt like a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. I have never bought myself birthday presents before, but I kind of like it!